You know what they say: hindsight is 20/20. But it’s not until you’ve been through divorce or a tough breakup that you begin to realize how much truth that platitude actually holds.
Take it from the folks on Reddit. On Thursday night, the thread “Divorcees of Reddit, what things did your ex do before your marriage that, in hindsight, you should have known not to marry him/her?” blew up on the social network, with both men and women weighing in with the pre-marriage warning signs they ignored.
So what were some of the most ominous red flags? For one man, it started with meeting the folks:
intensenerd: When I arrived, there were two men leaving their home wearing suits and driving a rental car. When I asked who they were, her mom explained that it was 2 producers from the Jerry Springer show. They were there to interview her grandfather and her big brother.
The episode they were invited to appear on was called “Grandpa stole my wallet and my girlfriend.”
Her brother couldn’t go because his probation officer didn’t want him leaving the state.
Also found out right before we got married that she was cheating on her boyfriend with me… A man she then left me for again and is now divorced from.
Yikes. Down-thread, one woman said a shady office relationship should have been warning enough:
OfTheBegin_Ning: He had an uncomfortably close “friendship” with a girl he worked with, and it was practically a weekly thing for me to ask if he was involved with her. He always denied it up and down. Yeah, they’re married now.
The last straw for this Redditor? When her husband asked for an open marriage.
For another woman, the pre-marriage warning sign was her boyfriend’s utter lack of compassion when her grandfather died.
Valeskatriona: The day my grandfather died, I was crying on the front porch and he just stood there with his arms crossed and stared at me. I had to ask for a hug. He also did not come to the funeral and when I was with my family afterwords he sent me several text messages asking why I wasn’t home already. When I got home he guilt tripped me, because I wasn’t home earlier for him to comfort me. Yeah… I was an idiot. Needless the say, the marriage did not last.
But perhaps the most glaringly obvious red flag mentioned on the thread? butthead_is_my_cat’s partner’s tendency to refer to their marriage as a “starter marriage.” Eek. Live and let live, we guess?
For additional information: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/03/22/red-flags_n_2934838.html